Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Therapy

Are you involved with a pathological Narcissist/Sociopath/Psychopath? A Gaslighter?

If so, you:

  • May be feeling alone, exhausted and confused in this difficult relationship,
  • Tolerate strange and abusive behaviour,
  • Recognize your boundaries are not respected,
  • “Walk on eggshells” around this person, always feel “on alert”,
  • Might feel “addicted” to this person and you keep going back, hoping it will “be better this time?”

And, even though you try to explain it to friends and family, they don’t or simply cannot understand.

Here are some of the classic, identifiable signs and behaviours of the pathological Narcissist.

They:

  • Have a grandiose sense of their own self importance
  • Need constant attention and admiration
  • Lack empathy
  • Rarely take responsibility for their mistakes and blame others
  • Don’t respect authority or laws
  • Are entitled and feel superior to others, need to “one up” everyone
  • Make friends too easily and/or they do not have any long term friends
  • Begin relationships with “a bang” of intense romance then strange behaviours set in
  • Are charming to the outside world and erratic and abusive behind closed doors
  • Easily share their expectations of you but never ask your expectations of them
  • Constantly “raise the bar” in expectation of you and what they expect from you
  • Do not fight fair – they stop speaking to you or they leave
  • When they perceive criticism, they RAGE or they go SILENT
  • Need to “win at all cost”
  • Have a history of failed relationships due to lying or cheating
  • Lie about small things
  • Often project their own feelings, realities onto you
  • Make slanderous, preposterous statements about you, directly to you
  • Make impulsive life altering decisions without any regard to how it affects them or family
  • Often display an obvious and distinguishable smirk on their face
  • Mirror your emotions – they can look concerned but do not actually feel it
  • When you look into their eyes, you cannot actually “feel” them
  • Exhibit easily identifiable, repetitive life patterns
  • Have a deluded sense of reality
  • Act like the Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde character

If any of this seems true, you have likely been subject to narcissistic abuse by someone with narcissistic personality disorder, a character disorder determined by the DSM-4 and DSM-5 (Diagnostic Statistical Manual, American Psychiatric Association) and your brain has likely been injured by the constant stress response perpetuated by the NPDs behaviours.

If so, you:

  • May be feeling alone, exhausted and confused in this difficult relationship,
  • Tolerate strange and abusive behaviour,
  • Recognize your boundaries are not respected,
  • “Walk on eggshells” around this person, always feel “on alert”,
  • Might feel “addicted” to this person and you keep going back, hoping it will “be better this time?”

And, even though you try to explain it to friends and family, they don’t or simply cannot understand.

Here are some of the classic, identifiable signs and behaviours of the pathological Narcissist.

They:

  • Have a grandiose sense of their own self importance
  • Need constant attention and admiration
  • Lack empathy
  • Rarely take responsibility for their mistakes and blame others
  • Don’t respect authority or laws
  • Are entitled and feel superior to others, need to “one up” everyone
  • Make friends too easily and/or they do not have any long term friends
  • Begin relationships with “a bang” of intense romance then strange behaviours set in
  • Are charming to the outside world and erratic and abusive behind closed doors
  • Easily share their expectations of you but never ask your expectations of them
  • Constantly “raise the bar” in expectation of you and what they expect from you
  • Do not fight fair – they stop speaking to you or they leave
  • When they perceive criticism, they RAGE or they go SILENT
  • Need to “win at all cost”
  • Have a history of failed relationships due to lying or cheating
  • Lie about small things
  • Often project their own feelings, realities onto you
  • Make slanderous, preposterous statements about you, directly to you
  • Make impulsive life altering decisions without any regard to how it affects them or family
  • Often display an obvious and distinguishable smirk on their face
  • Mirror your emotions – they can look concerned but do not actually feel it
  • When you look into their eyes, you cannot actually “feel” them
  • Exhibit easily identifiable, repetitive life patterns
  • Have a deluded sense of reality
  • Act like the Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde character

If any of this seems true, you have likely been subject to narcissistic abuse by someone with narcissistic personality disorder, a character disorder determined by the DSM-4 and DSM-5 (Diagnostic Statistical Manual, American Psychiatric Association) and your brain has likely been injured by the constant stress response perpetuated by the NPDs behaviours.

The Narcissistic Personality Disordered person has classic, identifiable patterns of behaviour that can hurt you:

  • Abuse Cycle – Idealization (Love bombing) – Devalue (Subtle, insidious putdowns/blame) – Discard (Disappearing/emotional abuse)
  • Triangulation – bringing in the “ex” or a third party to cause confusion/comparison
  • Gaslighting – when you know you’ve read it “right”, but they try to convince you, you’ve read it “wrong”
  • Cognitive Dissonance – torn between believing what you want to believe and what you know is the truth
  • Trauma Bonding – attachment dilemma that occurs from narcissistic abuse – betrayal, neglect, lies, silent treatments
  • Flying Monkey – third party who acts on behalf of a narcissist usually for a deliberate abusive purpose
  • Stockholm Syndrome – emotional trauma bond of target/victim with the abuser, in order to survive their ordeal of living under threat
  • Smear Campaign – intentional, premeditated effort to discredit the reputation of a target/victim of the narcissist/sociopath
  • Hoovering – attempt by a Narcissist/Sociopath to “suck” their target/victim back into the relationship, named after the Hoover vacuum cleaner.

At first these behaviours are hard to see, but as you become more aware and trust your inner feelings, you will begin to see these classic, identifiable behaviours more clearly.  And yes, this is actually happening!

Narcissistic abuse is a real thing, often causing complex PTSD.

Symptoms of Narcissistic Abuse and Complex PTSD:

  • intense emotions
  • addictions get worse (alcohol, drugs, shopping etc.)
  • feeling a loss of self, no control in life, not “who you really are”
  • panic, terror, dread attacks, anxiety, stress, depression
  • feeling unsafe, jumpy, vulnerable, don’t know what to do next
  • helplessness, hopelessness, powerless (the dark triad is a real thing caused by abuse)
  • feeling heavy shame, confusion (“how did this happen?  maybe its my fault?  is it really abuse?”)
  • obsessed with seeking answers, 24/7 detective, stalking the abuser (online, in-person)
  • wanting so badly to believe it isn’t true
  • brain fog, insomnia, nightmares, waking up in a panic
  • friends and family don’t “really get it”
  • irrational loyalty to the abuser (returning to abuser over and over)

If this is happening to you it’s important to get help!

And recovery from this type of relationship can be fast tracked when you work with someone who understands Narcissistic Personality Disordered people and their classic, identifiable behaviours.

3-Stage Recovery Plan

A 3 Stage Recovery plan to get you back to yourself:

 

  1. Address acute symptoms
  2. Tools and Homework for the 3 stages of recovery from Narcissistic Abuse
  3. EMDR to desensitize the trauma bond/Or Brainspotting for deep focussed mindfulness healing 

The Program

This program begins with assessment of where you are in the recovery process  (even if you’ve just become aware of narcissistic abuse today!) and goes through a step-by-step healing process, drug-free, to get you back to your authentic self.  For most, this is a medium to long term therapy process, your brain has been stressed for a period of time and needs “rewiring” back to a healthy state.

It’s important to heal from from narcissistic abuse or you may stay in a constant state of complex PTSD which in the end will cause isolation, avoidance, and could cause dissociation of self, in other words a complete break from reality.

This is the hard truth about Narcissistic Abuse.

Fees

I work exclusively with targets of Narcissistic Abuse.  I offer recovery therapy to help heal your wounds from the relationship as well as your wounds from early childhood.  The healing is within you, I just facilitate your process.

The longer you wait, the more difficult the healing will be … you do NOT have to suffer anymore.  Commit to healing yourself with a therapist who understands narcissistic abuse.

 

  • Please email me for my current fees: [email protected]
  • Please contact your Insurance company to confirm you are covered for therapy with a licensed Registered Psychotherapist, College of Registered Psychotherapist of Ontario.

  Narcissistic abuse therapy engages you in evidence-based trauma treatment therapy for healing the trauma bond and ultimately healing the earlier childhood trauma that got you unconsciously involved with the abuser in the first place. Together with enhancing the executive functioning of your brain and calming the stress system of the brain, healing will occur.

Your road to Recovery!

It is not your fault you were a target, but it is your responsibility to heal. Click below, and let’s get started on getting you to a better place!

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