There are many, many articles, books, podcasts, tiktoks, you tubes, courses and even summits on narcissism out there, everyone is talking about it, but from my perspective
… still, no-one is getting it!
The way I see it, we live on this earth, at this time with a massive duality in human wisdom, civility, maturity and positivity. There are those who are wise, civil, mature and positive AND there are those who are unwise, uncivil, immature and negative.
There are those at the top of the mountain with a far-reaching view and there are those at the bottom of the mountain with a tiny, narrow, self absorbed view.
We can begin to notice the complete opposites of these human in society when we think of …
- Empaths (top of the mountain) vs. Narcissists (bottom of the mountain) Mature behaviour (top) vs. Immature behaviour (bottom)
- Agreeableness personality trait (top) vs. Neuroticism personality trait (bottom) The Light (top) vs. The Dark (bottom)
- The Truth Seekers vs. The Liars and Deceitful The Happy vs. The Miserable
- The Soulful vs. The Soulless The Selfless vs. The Selfish The Tolerant vs. The Intolerant
- The “cup half full” thinkers vs. The “cup half empty” thinkers High vibratory energy vs. Low vibratory energy
- Peaceful vs. Chaotic
And of course there is a spectrum of humans in between these vast opposites.
No human is better than another. We are all here with purpose. Some find their purpose through self reflection and awareness, some do not. But in my opinion, we all have roles to play in order to evolve our human consciousness and our expanding and ever evolving quest for love and oneness
Let’s look at it a little closer… continuing to use the analogy of a mountain.
Those who exist at “the top of the mountain” have perhaps lived many previous lives. They have been climbing the mountain life after life, evolving their souls, garnering experiences, wisdom, compassion, trust, joy, and they are closer to true love (God?) as they ascend the mountain of life.
The higher they climb toward the mountain top, the closer they approach full wisdom, civility, maturity and positivity. They have earned these higher level human qualities as they have ascended, life after life. They are less fearful, more poised, self-directed and patient with each step. They are kind, forgiving, tolerant and civil. And as they climb higher, they have a clearer view, a broader view, a freer view, an extraordinary view as they near the top.
Those at “the very bottom of the mountain” are possibly “new lifers”, first borns, new souls and have been given a certain set of limited skills to live their first life – intellectuality, charm and wit (much like “the Devil”) However, they are impaired in empathy, intimacy, self direction and self identity. Some do well in their first life, some do not!
As they start on the mountain climb, they lack wisdom, are ill-behaved, immature and quite simply, miserable. They are tricksters, deceitful, and selfish. Their view is limited, muddy, cloudy at the bottom of the mountain. Their life is difficult, chaotic, impulsive, greedy, based on fear. They cannot possibly see what those at the top of the mountain see and they believe entirely that what they see is absolutely finite and real – yet to those at the top, its dark and delusional!
And well, there is the spectrum in humanity from those at the bottom of the mountain to those at the top. For example, those in the middle can’t quite see what those at the top of the mountain can see, but can certainly see what those at the bottom see although it may be cloudy.
Another way to look at it? Use the analogy of human age to where someone might be on the mountain. And hence the wisdom of age. Those at the bottom are 0-5 years old, the next level upward say 6-18 years old, 19-30 years old all the way to the very tip top of the mountain – 100 years old. The higher on the mountain the innately wiser.
When we then include the Law of Duality, which basically states that everything is on a continuum and has a complementary opposite within the whole, we can create a visual of a mountain that differs very much from top to bottom.
Here we can see the polar opposites as it relates to life perspective, money, fear, ego, selfishness, separateness, civility, maturity, and so on and so on. The higher on the mountain, the clearer, more selfless and brighter the view. The lower on the mountain, a more narrow, selfish and clouded view.
But, as I see it in today’s world…. the mountain is upside down.
Those at the bottom of the mountain, with a muddier view … ARE in charge and have created chaos and incivility. They are growing in power, greed and darkness. They are cheating systems, raging against the wise, stealing from the vulnerable, breaking rules set by civil law, crossing boundaries in all societal systems and needing to win at all cost. The 5 year olds are ruling the roost!
Those at the top of the mountain with the clearer view MUST be in charge, would offer clear direction to abundance, love and freedom for all and would do it in a civil manner. They have the ability to include even those with a muddier view.
What’s the solution?
In my view, those at the top must learn that fragile egos, less wisdom and deep seated fears are the basis of those at the bottom of the mountain. Those at the top must remember they were once at the bottom. Even though their view is clear and light, they must remember what it feels and looks like in the dark. It’s in them as a knowing.
One clear solution requires those at the top to change how they communicate to those at the bottom. Why? Because those at the bottom cannot see what those at the top see. Their vision is not as broad. They cannot see what those at the top can see. The 5 year old believes they are the center of the world and that they matter. (None of us really matter, do we?)
Communication with those at the bottom of the mountain with fragile egos must be mastered in order to make them feel in charge. Remember how you once negotiated an irritable 5 year old to eat their vegetables? You may have used a counter intuitive approach, “Spinach makes you strong like Popeye.”
And as difficult as that may be, it is our challenge to become better at it than we’ve ever been before. Those at the top of the mountain must learn that counter-intuitive communication is essential to our survival as a species.
To be continued in my next blog ….
Martha C. Digby Registered Psychotherapist www.marthadigby.com
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